"Um unersetzlich sein, muss man immer anders sein." - Coco Chanel

I have so much pent up energy right now that I can't even handle it!
 
Where do I even begin?
 
I have everything planned out from now until next year. I am so excited! I know it is fool proof, you know why?
 
My plan is to let life happen and not think about it because anything could happen. :)
 
I can't wait for this adventure to unfold!
 
XOXO,
 
unersetzlich

So I was talking to my friend today, and he was telling me about how he's planning to get high for the first time and everything. It's like, okay, cool, yeah I remember more highschool kids than I could imagine would get high or drunk, and I remember discovering it and not believing half of it. I was never like that, and I have been reassured that I don't miss out.
 
But then I think about some other things, and I have to wonder what I am missing.
 
My favorite authors created their masterpieces under the influence of something. Hemingway preferred to write drunk. Kerouac took LSD. Virginia Woolf was on many medications. ETC. I have a couple of questions as to why that is.
 
1.) Why did they feel they needed to be under the influence to create their best art?
 
2.) What does the substance do to bring that out of them?
 
3.) Am I going to be just as poignant a writer as them even if I choose not to do that?
 
If it's a nature of bringing the truth out or reverting back to the most primeval and organic state of mind, I will say that I am honest enough that I cannot write anything that isn't true to my heart.
 
But what if it's not?
 
I'm not saying I'm going to go out and get high or drunk, etc. That's not who I am, but sometimes, I like to wonder.
 
ANYWAYS...
 
I cannot wait until I am free of all of this work I have to do!
 
I want to see where life takes me this summer - I am in the mood for another big adventure.
 
Here is an honesty hour from @fairlyoddkitten ! I tag @indieloverr , @nnargles , @hippie-indie , @ezster , and @missmoni ! Have fun!
 
1: What do you put on hotdogs?
Ketchup, Mustard, and Dill Relish

2: Do you say "anticlimatic" or "anticlimactic"?
I say anticlimactic.

3: Do you check flyers before grocery shopping?
Very Rarely

4: Blue, black, or some other color pen ink?
I had this Pilot pen that was a maroon color, and that was fun!

5: Do you use your parking brake?
Yep.

6: Look to your left. How many framed pictures are on the wall?
Three.

7: Do you know how to play chess?
Yes! I've been playing since I was 7-8 years old.

8: How often do you clean the interior of your car?
Whenever it needs it

9: Do you ever read the last few pages first?
Not unless I have already read the book and know what happens

10: Ever fallen in the shower?
No, but I've come close plenty of times.

11: Do you have a Snuggie?
Yes, and it was the best $20 I had ever spent - I am not joking.

12: Are you allergic to anything?
Nope.

13: Do you have any TV shows on DVD?
Gossip Girl Seasons 1-6, The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo, every John Hughes movie made in the 80's that you can think of, Princess Bride, The Lucky One, The Notebook, The Twilight Saga, Harry Potter, etc.

14: How many times do you hit the snooze button before finally getting out of bed?
I get up the first time it rings because it's really unhealthy to "snooze."

15: Are you a vegetarian?
Nope - I have considered it, but it's not for me.

16: Do you have an unpopular opinion? What is it?
I will let you know when I think of one. It's not that I am ab-original, I just cannot think of anything off the top of my head this late at night.
 
17: What is one of your favorite quotes?
"Write drunk." - Ernest Hemingway

18: What's the most physically painful thing you've ever experienced?
Recently, it was smacking my hip off the corner of a desk and giving myself a lovely purple bruise.

19: What's your favourite book genre?
I love modernism, but I dabble in a bit of everything. It's easier to ask what I hate, haha, and that is dystopian novels. I'm so picky with them.
 
20: Have you ever walked out of a movie at the theater?
No, I always stay till the end.

21: Do dogs like you?
Yes, and it's mutual.

22: Do people listen when you speak?
Usually, but I'm not sure it's always their choice; I have a naturally loud speaking voice.

23: What is one thing that you do exceptionally well? Be honest.
Writing, hands down.

24: Do you pause movies/TV shows if you have to go to the bathroom or the kitchen, or do you just let them keep playing?
I always pause.

25: How often do you forget to close your parentheses?
NEVER. I haven't forgotten since I learned HTML.

26: Are you reading anything right now? If yes, what?
Keny Kesey's "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest"

26: What is the next thing you are gonna buy?
Hopefully a pair of orange Supergas

Hey, everyone!
 
I am so sorry I have not been on as much lately! I have been extremely busy! I miss all of you terribly!
 
I could sit here and blog about my more recent adventures, but I would rather do an honesty hour with all of you! I'll save my adventure from last weekend for another day!
 
I tag @fionapie , @nnargles , @karineminzonwilson , @ezster , @fairlyoddkitten and @missmoni ! Have fun! I stole this from @indieloverr !
 
Friends on Polyvore who you know in real life:
Unfortunately, none.
 
Friends on Polyvore who you don’t know in real life:
Amanda

Three places you’d like to go on vacation?
Iceland, South Africa, Ireland

Do you like chocolate?
MORE LIKE LOVE.

Which is your favorite body part of the human face and why?
It really depends on the person. Some people, I love their nose, some I love their eyes, some I love their jaw, some I love their chin...it's all about who you are. I personally like eyebrows - they are very unique.
 
Do you like rainy days or snowy winter days more?
Rainy days for sure!
 
Which is your favorite four legged creature?
I don't know if turtles count considering their's are technically fins...I'm going with the Honey Badger on this one! ;)
 
Do you like spicy food?
Every now and then I do enjoy a kick!

Do you remember your favorite teacher?
I don’t really have an all time favorite teacher, but I’ve had some that really made an impact on me, particularly my bio and English teachers from sophomore year.
 
Tell me about your favorite book, magazine, or comic.
Book: The Great Gatsby
Magazine: Vogue
Comic: Spiderman - never gotten into them much, but he's my favorite superhero

Tell me about the last movie you watched.
I watched the Princess Diaries 2 and fell asleep when Anne Hathaway found out she was supposed to marry in 30 days.

Tell me about your favorite music/band.
The Smiths, Simon & Garfunkel, and the 500 Days of Summer Soundtrack
 
Three favorite foods?
Lemon Fusilli, Cannolis, and Hummus .
 
Do you like to shop?
I'm obsessed. I really need to work at J.Crew or something - THE DISCOUNTS!
 
Are you usually late, early, or right on time?
No matter how hard I try to be on time or late, I am always early.

Are you happy with your life for the most part right now?
Yes. Except my school is frustrating.
 
What would be harder, telling someone that you love them or that you don’t?
Probably telling them that I don’t love them. It would break my heart to tell someone that and break their heart. I know how that feels.

What’s your middle name?
S.

How big is your bed?
Twin size.

What music are you listening to right now?
Blind Pilot - on Pandora

Who was the last person you hugged?
My mom.

How is the weather right now?
It just stormed, but it's warm and springy!
 
Are you a different person now than you were five years ago?
Oh my God, where do I begin?
 
Favorite fruit?
Pineapples!
 
Do you have a collection of anything?
Shoes and Clothes
 
Have you ever had a crush on a best friend?
Yep, but I'm over it, and he never knew, so it's all good!

Would you ever tell a person you have a crush on that you like him/her?
I have been in that situation multiple times, and none have ended well, so I am done with that.

Do you consider yourself popular?
I mean, people like me, I like people (for the most part), but no, I am not your stereotypical popular.

Have you ever cut yourself on purpose?
Fortunately, no.

Would you ever date someone older than you?
Sure, why not.
 
Younger than you?
It depends. If he is a smidgen younger, like a year younger, then sure. Any younger than that, and it's just awkward.

Have you ever been on a diet?
Nah.

Have you ever gotten detention?
Nope!

Do you usually prefer books or movies?
Books, usually.
 
Have you ever written a love letter?
Yes, but I obviously tore it up and threw it away.
 
Are you a morning person or a night person?
Morning.

Do you make wishes on shooting stars?
Yep!

Celebrity role models?
Carey Mulligan. I want to BE her.

Who would you want to be tied to for 24 hours?
Joseph Gordon-Levitt....or Joseph Morgan...

How many piercings do you have?
My ears. I have always wanted my tragus pierced though.

What is the longest crush/relationship you have had?
Relationship: Nonexistent - I have had "things" with guys, but we never DTR-ed.
Crush: A couple years
 
What is the meanest thing anyone has ever said about you?
I was like my father.
 
What is the best compliment you have ever received?
I am a good writer.
 
What does your username mean?
Unersetzlich = Irreplaceable

Have you ever made a prank phone call?
Nope, but I have been the victim of many.

Do you smoke?
No.

Have you ever been drunk?
Nope.

Have you ever cried during a movie?
Yep! That's when you know it's a good movie! ;)

Do you take the shampoo/conditioner bottles from hotel?
ABSOLUTELY.

Do you always smile for pictures?
Always - the fresh air is good for your teeth!
 
XOXO,
 
unersetzlich

Lately, it seems I have been reminded of a whole bunch of things.
 
Does that mean I have been in denial the whole time I haven't been reminded of those things?
 
Maybe.
 
But is that necessarily a bad thing, believing that things can change?
 
I don't think so. I think that is what provides optimism and strength to people - going into something knowing the odds, failing, and then picking themselves up again.
 
I have learned so much about people this past year that I love it yet hate it at the same time. Sometimes I don't understand, nor do I want to, but I think that's being naive.
 
I think that's denial.
 
I think people should try to understand each other more, and that would create peace in the world.
 
The shame of it is, we don't want to understand as much as we may empathize with the person because we are too involved in ourselves.
 
So I guess my reminder to you is that people are all living their own lives, and as much as you may not want to understand someone, or as much as you may dislike them, take a walk in their shoes and see how they may be feeling.
 
Gain some perspective before you judge.
 
And even when you judge, don't be steadfast in your judgement. Be optimistic because (I believe, at least) things are capable of changing, always.
 
XOXO,
 
unersetzlich

That has to be one of my most favorite quotes ever.
 
Drunk doesn't have to mean intoxicated in the more common sense - it can mean intoxicated by a sudden wave of rage, exasperation, sadness, happiness, or love. It can be the state in which one is drunk with the time of the night and the earliness of the morning - those few hours before dawn where you are so tired you don't feel tired.
 
It's where all of the absolutely raw feeling emerges and sinks into the paper with finality and finesse.
 
XOXO,
 
unersetzlich

I feel like my life is going a mile a minute!
 
I am craving another adventure. I want to hike to the top of a mountain and take pictures of the landscape below. I want to see views that make me salivate at their beauty.
 
I just want to experience the world and life!
 
And that urge grows stronger each day.
 
XOXO,
 
unersetzlich

Today my friend Hanna and I traipsed around the city after we finished the work we had to do. It was really fun! We went to this Asian noodle place for lunch, and then we stumbled upon a treasure trove of a vintage bookstore that not only had first editions of hundreds of books, but they had vinyls and CDs from way-back-when! I happened upon a Smiths CD - Strangeways, Here We Come, and I almost died! I have been listening to it on repeat since I came home!
 
More often than not lately, I have been sticking to the basics in terms of clothing. I don't mind it so much. You can look really cute in a soft tee and lounge pants! My life has been so busy that my outfits are taking shotgun right now.
 
XOXO,
 
unersetzlich

I am a writer -- it's something I have always known in my heart.
 
Lately, people have been challenging that causing me to question myself.
 
But the thing is, I know who I am. Just because you don't like my voice or my style does not make me a bad writer. It means that there are things I still have yet to learn to better my writing, despite the negative criticism.
 
XOXO,
 
unersetzlich

In highschool, I had this gym teacher who was a huge jerk. At that point, I hadn't met anyone so sexist in my entire life or someone who took his class so seriously. I mean, come on, it was P.E. for crying out loud!
 
I remember I was one of the five girls in my class, and I also remember I was the one out of all the girls AND boys who had the best grade (a 95% all year long!). It was primarily because I shut my mouth and did what he asked us to do.
 
I don't think any other P.E. class kept me as fit as his.
 
Anyways, I remember the kids younger than me asking me whether or not he was a good teacher, and I was hesitant to tell them what he was like because even though I had him all year, I didn't understand him. (Although, I didn't really need to because it was none of my business, but come on, something has to happen to you to make you as arrogant as you are.)
 
Well a couple weeks ago, I learned that he had battled both leukemia and stomach cancer when he was younger.
 
This man faced death, meanwhile he teaches health and physical education.
 
I have to wonder what went through his mind, you know? Maybe he realized it's better to be arrogant and push the kids to be healthy because of what he went through. Maybe when he faced death, he realized the importance of life, no matter how cliche that sounds. He was preparing us so that we have less of a chance to encounter the same fate.
 
But the point is, I understood him.
 
Sometimes it's hard to understand people.
 
I mean, I think I am a pretty understanding person, more understanding than 99% of the human population, I think.
 
However, when I'm left out of the loop, and you know that I know, that's when it becomes a problem. Or, when you decide to make me kiss your butt but then whirl around and kiss mine so that I don't "tell on you," it's not going to change the fact that you are a jerk.
 
I don't understand what compels people to be mean and nasty.
 
I guess we all go through something that impacts us, and turns us into the person we are today.
 
But the point is that fork in the road where you can choose to either turn right or left onto a path to your future. You are the builder of your future, so if you don't want to be one way, don't! Learn from what you don't want to be!
 
I think this man chose the high road. Despite the outcome of his personality, I admire him.
 
XOXO,
 
unersetzlich

Happy Belated Valentine's Day, Everyone!
 
I love you all so much!
 
My valentine's day was so lovely this year! Of course, as always, I spent it single, but my friends just could not have made me happier. I woke up with a message from Christopher, candy from my girls, and a chocolate rose from my beloved friend Kinsey. (He was so sweet, he almost made me cry!) I could not stop smiling all day!
 
In honor of Valentine's Day, I feel I owe ya'll another Honesty Hour! Enjoy!
 
I tag: @fionapie, @indieloverr, @ezster, @fairlyoddkitten, and @nnargles! Have fun, ladies!
 
1. Who was your first kiss and what was it like?
 
My first kiss was on the cheek, in the third grade, by this boy who I still do not like to this day. It felt really awkward, and I remember I didn't tell my mom for days because I was embarrassed. ;)

2. Are you in a relationship? If so, are you happy?
 
Nah, and the way I see it, it will happen when it happens, and I will be happy for as long as I can be happy. :)

3. Do you have a crush?
 
JOSEPH GORDON-LEVITT
 
4. Who is your crush?
 
JOSEPH GORDON-LEVITT
 
5. Are you a virgin?
 
I don't kiss and tell.
 
6. What do you think of Valentine's Day?
 
It's okay. I've always been indifferent about it, you know? I like to hear about the romances my friends are in, and I like that they show all the corny romcoms.

7. Who is your Valentine?
 
This year, I have to say it was Master Kins - you are such a doll!

8. Have you ever asked anyone out?
 
Yup. After a few times, I learned you have to pick your moment, though.
 
9. Who is your celebrity crush?
 
JOSEPH GORDON-LEVITT

10. Has anyone ever asked you out and you turned them down?
 
Nah, not really.
 
11. Do you think anyone has a crush on you right now?
 
That would be so sweet if they did!
 
12. What is your favorite thing to do on Valentine's Day?
 
I kid you not, eat chocolate.
 
13. What's the best Valentine's Day that you've had so far?
 
Probably this year. Like I said, I am indifferent to the holiday for the most part.
 
14. What's your idea of a perfect date?
 
I like simplicity with spontaneity. Simple, but not planned out to a T.

15. How do you know when you're in love?
 
I can honestly say I have been in love once and only once. I don't really know how I knew. I just felt it in my heart that he completed me in some way.

16. Have you ever loved someone on a romantic level?
 
Yep. (Please see above)
 
17. Do you prefer more or less clingy relationships?
 
I'm a pretty independent person. I have never been one of those girls who clings to her boyfriend in the halls in highschool. I like to have my own life, but have someone to come home to at the end of the day and share my day with. But I like clingy to the point where I want this person for me, and that we would go out of our way for each other. I guess I would say a well balance relationship is more what I prefer.
 
18. Do you feel like you're loved on an everyday basis?
 
Yes, I do!
 
19. Are you usually the first person to make a move.
 
I have been, but I have learned that if he wants to make a move, he will.
 
20. Have you ever asked someone out and they turned you down?
 
Ehhhhh yeahhhh...but like in really, really not nice ways.
 
21. Do you feel like you're the dumpee or dumper most of the time?
 
I feel like I'm the dumpee more often than not.

22. What's your "type"?
 
I'm not sure that I really have one, honestly.
 
23. What are some of your favorite physical characteristics for your crush to have?
 
Cleanliness! - He has to look and smell clean!
I also like a nice build on a guy.. :)
 
24. Are you a hopeless romantic?
 
I can be, yeah.

25. Do you think that you're a good kisser?
 
I don't kiss and tell, but I would like to think so!
 
26. What's the farthest that you've ever gone?
 
I don't kiss and tell!
 
27. Have you ever had a secret admirer?
 
It's a nice thought, yes..

28. Have you ever been someone's secret admirer?
 
On many an occasion, yes.

29. Do you have romantic fantasies? If so, what are they like and who is in them?
 
Honestly, who doesn't? I imagine myself marrying Joseph Gordon-Levitt, kissing said guy, and dating another said guy...it's fun to think about!

30. What's something that always turns you on?
 
When a guy dances with you. That is probably the best one. And when I say dance, I mean dance - none of this other nonsense. There is just something really personal about sharing a dance with someone...pshhh call me old fashioned! Haha!
 
XOXO,
 
unersetzlich